Working It Out
by dreamgoddess'92
Summary: Hotch loses his temper and yells at Emily while on a case. Can he fix his mistake and make Emily realize he doesn't want to lose her.


Hey everyone.

Just a little something to tide you over until I start on the sequel to "Days Go By" (which has gotten some serious support-thank you to everyone!) I had heard this song before but after listening to it again and looking at the lyrics I thought 'OMG, this is perfect for Hotch!' I'm not the hugest Adam Lambert fan (and that has nothing to do with his life style btw) but I think I might give his music a chance. I love this song though.

I do not own Criminal Minds (well I have the boxed Season 4, but that doesn't really count) notr "Whataya Want From Me" by Adam Lambert.

Please enjoy and review!

* * *

_Hey, slow it down_

_Whataya want from me? _

_Whataya want from me?_

_Yeah, I'm afraid_

_Whataya want from me?_

_Whataya want from me?_

Aaron Hotchner's life had take a turn for the better since the recent tragedy that had transpired, but leave it to an alpha male with relationship issues to fuck that up.

Since Haley's death Hotch had felt like he was in some sick version of limbo where he wanted to move on but his guilt had him bound tightly. The team had been more than accommodating and they managed to insert themselves into his personal life with his son quite flawlessly; one dark haired beauty in particular.

It came as no surprise to anyone that Emily logged more 'look-after-Hotchner-men' hours than the others on the team. She was constantly projecting her concern for Hotch and Jack and it was well received. Hotch thought it was nice to have someone who cared to visibly about him and his son. However, Hotch was now under the distinct impression he had managed to screw up any chances with Emily. Life sucked.

He wasn't sure exactly what caused him to be in an unpleasant mood, but Emily had drawn the short straw and unfortunately had been on the receiving end of his temper. Not to mention the fact he berated her in front of the team. Ouch.

All she did was give her input on the odd behavior of their unsub, as she was paid to do, and Hotch had basically told her she didn't know what she was talking about and to not question his original prognosis. Hotch was sure he'd never forget the intense hurt that surged across her eyes nor the looks of disbelief the team had shot him after his tantrum was over. He hadn't even gotten a chance to apologize yet.

Ironically, Emily had been right about their unsub all along and Hotch had cringed when she, their female assailant, took Emily down. Double ouch.

Thankfully Emily only sustained a few bruises and a scrape here and there, but the look she shot Hotch when Morgan helped her to her feet was enough to make Hotch worried for his well being. Oh yeah, he had screwed up majorly and no amount of free coffee was going to fix it this time.

Emily had the good graces of a politician's daughter and managed to keep her professionalism in tact as Hotch drove her and Dave back to the precinct. The silence was almost deafening, but Hotch knew there was nothing he could say to make up for his blunder a few hours ago. He had single handedly managed to piss off the one woman he couldn't imagine living without, long before Haley's death.

_There might have been a time_

_I would give myself away_

_Once upon a time I didn't give a damn_

_But now here we are so whataya want from me?_

_Whataya want from me?_

Hotch tried not to steal glances at the ferocious beauty next to him and focus on the road, but he failed miserably multiple times. Hotch wondered if she had seen something like this coming. It wasn't exactly a secret that he had his problems right now. There were so many things he had to sort thought just so he could get out of bed in the morning. Surely she had to understand that. He couldn't just give himself wholly to something he wasn't even sure was available.

Judging by the way her body curled away from him and her inability to look towards him, it was apparent Emily had expected some sort of reciprocation of her feelings and not a verbal slap for doing her job. Not only had he hurt her professionally, but he had pushed her away personally and he was at a loss of what to do.

Hotch could feel Dave's burning stare in his rearview mirror and looked up to meet his old friend's eyes. They held a mixture of pity, incredulity, and a shade of anger. He had seen the same cocktail in the other's eyes and felt guilt grip him by the throat. Dave knew fell well that Hotch had developed feelings for Emily and he could tell by the way Dave held his body that he was resisting the urge to knock him out. Hotch couldn't blame him.

At one point in Hotch's life he didn't care who he pissed off. As long as the job got done and he managed to cover his ass properly, Hotch didn't have a problem yelling at his subordinates if they messed up or questioned his authority. What he didn't understand was why he had to blow up at Emily. She hadn't questioned him per say just polished his profile a little, which she had done before. Like those times before she had also been right. He found it confounding that he had been so short with Emily when she had only been helping.

Once they arrived at the precinct, Emily quickly hopped out of the car as if being confined with Hotch was unbearable. He guess at the moment that it was.

_Just don't give up, I'm workin' it out_

_Please don't give in; I won't let you down_

_It messed me up, need a second to breathe_

_Just keep coming around_

_Hey, whataya want from me?_

_Whataya want from me?_

Hotch severely hoped that he didn't ruin their relationship. Emily wasn't one to back down from a challenge and taking care of him and his son had proved difficult on the best of days. Hotch didn't know what he'd do if Emily gave up on him. He just needed time to adjust; but maybe that was just a lame ass excuse because he was scared. He was afraid of letting Emily get closer to his bleeding heart.

"Fix it Aaron," was all Dave said before getting out of the car to follow Emily inside the building. Hotch looked outside of the window and saw JJ walking hurriedly while talking on the phone. He bet she was talking to their pilot; he knew she'd try and get them out of Alabama as soon as humanly possible. Morgan and Reid were not far behind and seemed to not see that Hotch was still inside his car. He had the sinking suspicion that they were ignoring him though and felt that was best.

Hotch took a deep breath and waited until everyone had disappeared into the building before making a quick phone call. He had to fix this.

- - - - -

The plane ride was full of small chatter and that seemed to fit the team just fine. Emily had found a way to sit as far from Hotch as possible without being on a separate air craft. Hotch tried to pretend that her cold actions didn't hurt him, but everyone could tell that they did. JJ and the others were torn between sympathy for their not-so-stable boss and anger at how he spoke to Emily during the case. They tried not to notice the faraway look in her dark eyes and the burning guilt that hovered in Hotch's. If they were having problems the whole team was thrown of kilter.

Hotch felt his frustration grow with each passing second Emily stared out the window of the jet. He had half a mind to go sit in front of her and apologize then, but he knew it would be useless. He needed to wait until she cooled down a little before attempting to apologize; he did value his life.

He was glad when the plane finally landed, but not glad when Emily grabbed her stuff and rushed off. He shook off the stares everyone was shooting him and quickly followed suit. For his plan to work, he needed to get her alone and get a word in edgewise or else he'd be kicking himself for many nights to come.

_Yeah, it's plain to see that baby you're beautiful_

_And it's nothing wrong with you_

_It's me – I'm a freak but thanks for lovin' me_

_Cause you're doing it perfectly_

"Come with me, please?" Hotch asked as he caught up with Emily. He put an arm behind her, not touching, to stop her from turning around and walking away. Emily stopped walking and turned to face him; uncertainty dancing in her eyes. He knew she was barely containing her rage and that she'd love nothing more than to yell at him.

The team stood by the plane to see what would happen. They were more nervous for Hotch at this point; Emily had a temper to rival Ares Greek God of War. They could see the inner battle raging within Emily and they held their breath as Emily's hand clenched into a fist. If she punched him, they wouldn't blame her. They knew Hotch wouldn't either.

Hotch tensed, his body preparing for impact until he saw the exhaustion in her eyes extinguish the rage. It was replaced with a deep sorrow that made Hotch want to punch himself in the gut. He wasn't going to let her feel that kind of pain when he was more than willing to take it away.

Emily nodded her head timidly and let Hotch open the passenger side door for her before closing it once she got in. He stood there for a minute, trying to collect his thoughts before hurrying to the driver's side. He saw the other car waiting for the rest of the team and figured they didn't mind taking it. He really needed to repair what he had broken and by the looks the team was shooting him he knew they were encouraging his actions. Dave gave his nod of approval before Hotch drove off and they all watched as they disappeared into the setting sun.

- - - - -

Emily didn't say anything as Hotch drove towards a destination that Emily hadn't the slightest idea of where it was.

His words had stung like a whip on raw flesh, but she clearly saw the regret and guilt in his eyes. It didn't make her anger go away completely but the tone of his voice when he asked her to go with him had weakened her wall of rage towards him. Sometime he didn't play fair. She was curious as to where he was taking her, but she figured it was some place she wouldn't expect: She had been right.

Part of Emily wanted to whip around and stare at him incredulously when her apartment came into view. The other part was extremely grateful when she saw the familiar scenery. She did want to talk, but the larger part of her wanted to get out of the car and go to bed. The day had been physically and emotionally tiring; no thanks to Hotch.

_There might have been a time_

_When I would let you step away_

_I wouldn't even try but I think_

_you could save my life_

Hotch turned off the car and waited half afraid that Emily would get out of the car before he mustered up the courage to tell her what was on his mind. Not too long ago he would've let her be angry at him in silence and they'd get over it in time.

Since they had gotten closer though, the thought that she was angry at him messed with his stomach in a bad way. He didn't want to run and hide behind his icy exterior anymore. He had the distinct feeling that Emily could bring him back from the brink of darkness that threatened to consume him when he was alone. She could help him love again.

Emily sat in the silence with Hotch and felt her anger subside into a dull ache in her heart. It was obvious he was struggling and she didn't want him to suffer. She needed him to say it though, she couldn't just pretend that she wasn't in pain. Emily knew she'd never be able to walk away from Aaron Hotchner, but he had to make an effort: He had to show her there was something-anything for them.

"Emily, I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I yelled at you, that I doubted your ability in the field, that you got hurt…" Hotch trailed off feeling like his words were inadequate. Emily nodded her head, understanding how apologizing was something hard for him to do.

"It's okay Hotch." Emily said after a few moments of silence but Hotch shook his head.

"No Emily it's not. I was in a bad mood and I blew up on you for no reason whatsoever." Hotch said a little stronger this time. Emily just sat back and listened, intrigued with what he had to say.

"I wish I could fully convey how sorry I am. I'm not good with words though and you know that. You've done nothing but help me and Jack and I yell at you in front of the team just because I woke up on the wrong side of the bed. Some thank you." Hotch said bitterly closing his eyes briefly before continuing. He had to try harder if he was going to make her see.

_Just don't give up, I'm workin' it out_

_Please don't give in; I won't let you down_

_It messed me up, need a second to breathe_

_Just keep coming around_

_Hey, whataya want from me?_

_Whataya want from me?_

He wasn't as ignorant as Dave claimed him to be. He knew Emily wanted something more than just a friendship with him and he was aware of the same desire within himself. He just needed more time; he needed to undergo a little more self repair before he could take that next step and he had to make sure Emily knew that. He didn't want her to think he didn't want her. That couldn't be farther from the truth: How could someone not want Emily Prentiss?

"I just need time Emily, can you give me that? I know I don't have the right to ask but…" Emily's hand on his stopped Hotch in mid sentence. He saw the liquid warmth in her eyes and knew she understood. Maybe she had always known.

"I can wait for as long as you need Aaron. We'll work this out." Emily said gripping his hand tightly in his causing a surge of heat to course though Hotch's veins. Emily wasn't going anywhere and he had the sudden thought that she'd never give up on him; no matter how broken or angry he got at the world. Hotch was going to try his hardest to prove to Emily he could be the man she deserved though he knew she'd take him no matter what condition he was in.

As they sat there in the warm car Hotch had no doubt that they'd get there eventually and that Emily really would give him back his life.

_Just don't give up on me_

_I won't let you down_

_No, I won't let you down_

* * *

_Well, there you have it. I can just feel the Hotch-ness in some of these lyrics. *laugh* I'm really crossing my fingers for some H/P action this season (it was on my Christmas list) I'm feeling a little curious, so what if your favorite episode? I am a huge fan of __Demonology_, _52 Pickup_, _Minimal Loss, _and_ Bloodline._ Oh I also love _Children of the Dark_, _Angel Maker _and _Elephant's Memory._ It's hard to pick just one episode, am I right? Honestly I'm not a huge fan of the first season because Elle kinda gets on my nerves and Emily is so much better so please let me know. =) (Oh and Season 5 can do no wrong at this point, I love all the episodes so far._ 100_ still made me bawl though.)

Hope you enjoyed my story.

Peace out.


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